Hi Spiritual Training Diary
I'm sick today and have been sick since the exiting bjj night. Fever and intense pain in throat and ears. I'm really bad at being sick, I get totally grumpy and can't think of anything worth doing that doesn't require my full physical potentiality. I am not a person who likes to lie on the couch too long.
Yesterday I was training to not think about stuff. This I did through watching Shameless for nine hours. It didn't work that well. Instead I though about things I've been thinking I wanna practice and need to practice in life as the summer turns inte something colder, wetter and darker.
Like thinking abstract and emotional. This I do intentionally for example in the morning when sitting staring in front of me with my coffee, or when falling asleep in the evening. Or when I have the luxuary of taking a nap in the daytime. At all these points I find my thinking loose and open, not rational but more flowing. It feels like I'm without an aim move around in the landscape that is my psyke. I get stuck on stuff or distracted, and don't try to force any sense out of it.
An other thing I've been practicing this summer is sensuality. Sensing. Listening. Embracing. Stopping to notice. (Cheesyness overload warning!) I have very much enjoyed and played with what I can feel with my body, and specifically how feel the surroundings, connecting with people, the Earth and otherness in general. I've practiced this for example through swimming naked in the ocean and lakes, going barefoot, whereing clothes and noticing how I feel in them, being in the forest, biking in Stockholm, being around people without talking so much, having sex with different people in different ways, talking about sex, being naked, feeling sun, wind, coldness, the smell of and old house and much more.
This I feel is easier in the summer and more difficult in te winter. But a challenge. F.ex. I intend to go to sauna and swimming a lot outside this winter. Come with me!
Hi spiritual training diary.
Today I started a new physical practice: brazilian jui jutsu, aka very anarchistic wrestling. I love it! Even though I was very unbalanced today (unemployment, my partner and roomate Amanda still on her never ending tour, thoughts about love, passion, commitments and painting), the physical activity of today was well balanced, and I was harmonic in it. This morning I took a ballet class for the first time in a long while, for a very dynamic teacher I like, who says "good work ladies" when we improve on something. I felt my different body parts close to eachother, yet with a lot of independency/space to move around. Which is a good feeling in ballet for me. It was easy to feel wight in the body, and I was grounded (as I was not in my thoughs around work and relationships...).
My sister Siri went to the jui jutsu training with me in the evening. Which made me very happy. We went through the whole begginner thing together. Listening to the rules. Sensing the hiearchies (very easy). It went smooth. I've been a beginner very often. It's not difficult.
I broke nail.
This though is my writing training from now on. I hope I'll write a lot, and that I space out more and more into poetry and new age shit!
One more thing: Siri told me today she's started training wieght lifting!!! I'm so impressed i almost fell off my bar-stool. Wieght lifting!!!